Sunday, 1 April 2012

Love and Marriage

People have a hard time admitting when something is broken. Marriage, properly lived, should be one of the most rewarding, enjoyable and sustaining experiences a person who is called to that vocation should ever experience. If it isn't then it is broken. Sure there will be ups and downs, hard times and good times, disagreements and differences of opinion, but in the long run, a true marriage will make your life better.

Olympic athletes are often praised more for the dedication and hard work they put into their sport than they are for the medal they receive. It is amazing to me that people think that marriage can work without the same level of dedication and perseverance. It is not possible. Marriage takes just as much commitment, dedication, and perseverance as training for the Olympics. If that sounds like too much work, then perhaps the person you are dating is not the right one for you.

Marriage is a commitment to carrying it out for the long haul. For better or worse, richer or poorer. It is the promise to help your spouse become a stronger person by becoming a stronger one yourself. It is knowing that you are 100% responsible for the success of the relationship.

True marriages are not 50/50. You can not be 50% committed to a relationship. Just try being 50% committed to your work. In a short time you will be 100% fired. Why people think that a 50/50 relationship will work is beyond me.

It drives me crazy when people use the most dysfunctional examples of marriage as if they are the norm. I have news for you people....they are NOT the norm. You don't describe a computer by saying it is not a toaster. Some will say, "but the statement is true"...yes, that statement is true but it does not bring someone closer to the true definition of a computer.

Likewise with marriage, one does not describe what true marriage is by comparing it to what it is not. Most people would agree that marital intimacy is one of the most pleasurable experiences a person can have. If it is not....there is a good chance that you are doing it wrong, or there may be something medical that needs to be checked out. Either way, there is an issue that needs to be resolved, if it is not resolved, as unfair as it is, one will not be able to have the full experience of making love.

There is something wrong when people look at my marriage and assume that it can't be working as well as it seems, as if we must be hiding something. The fact of the matter is, my marriage works, because I work at my marriage.

If you are not working on your marriage, you can be sure that sooner or later it is going to get broken.



  1. Well said! I completely agree! In a age where it is seen as "okay" to give up, why not trying to "fix" the things that are broken. If your marriage is broken, work to fix it. The best things in life require HARD WORK.

  2. This definitely gives me hope for the future. Being single, I hear all the time from people "do not get married". Why do they think they are giving me good advice? Isn't wanting to spend your life with someone the ultimate gift you can give? I am ready if I'm blessed with the opportunity.